Stop Touching Things

"Miss! you can't touch the artwork..."
"He means you, too, G-ma"

Friday, October 30, 2009

Chocolate, right to my door!

On my way into the office this morning I saw out of the corner of my eye a van. On the side of the driver's door was the company name.

Chocolate Couriers.

Oh, the joy! Someone is actually bringing chocolate right to the door! They read my mind, they know my heart!

It was so good it deserved a little rubber-necking. And that is when the other shoe dropped.

It seems my fancy got away from me; the sign actually said Corporate Couriers. Oh, well. I am sure they do a good job at whatever they do, but what a disappointment.

If anyone is looking for a business opportunity, may I suggest a Chocolate Courier?

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

A state of vagueness.

I was going to write all about my first firing. You can see from the pictures how they turned out. However, I am stuck on a thought about control. As you can see from the pictures the end result is quite different from the beginning product. Obviously. It's how the middle and the last piece relate that run through my head yelling "aha!". It is playing "bumper thoughts" with an issue I have at work. It's about control. Correction, it's about vagueness.

The glazes for pottery are interesting. I take my piece that I've formed. It's been bisked fired and is ready to get dressed. Seems like an important task. hmm...I bet that metalic green would look really cool... I open the metalic green glaze container to see this grey muck. I check the mustard yellow...its rusty muck. Okay, I see. suprise surprise. well, go with it. they have samples fired so I can guess roughly what it might look like... I can wait until next week to see the finished product. I think.

I move on to the raku pieces that we get to fire tonight. The first opportunity to fire as a class in the raku way. I grab the little bowls. My color choices are less...mostly blues. turquoise blue. blue nebula. The actual glazes are not blue but I am cool with this. I get it.
The firing goes on as promised. I am please with how they turned out but they are NOT blue. Why are they not BLUE?

This is what I ponder as I look at them. not blue. And maybe this is because I am at work but I am thinking about several friendly conversations I have had with my supervisor about being okay with vagueness. I generally say that I am okay working independantly and doing my own thing as long as I know the rules and boundries. This job comes with so many different levels of vagueness. I don't fee like going into all of them; just trust me that they are there. I am contantly talking to about how if I could just come up with a guideline. If I could just know "how many" people should I call a day. Then she tells me that it is part of the APO's for the next level up from me to be okay with vagueness.

All I want to know, is that somehow the blue glaze that looks like yellow muck will turn blue.
I am still thinking about this.

On a different note...The intructor came up to me as I was leaving and said that no matter what might happen for the rest of the class, what i made right there, is enough to have made the class a success. That is Raku. I have Barrett as a witness.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Look here, look here, we have prizes!

As our faithful readers know, both Howktown and Saariburg have been arrested and require you to bail us out.
Since we are partners in crime in the fight for babies (**SQUEEE**) we thought we would sweeten the deal for you.
Anyone who donates to both of our bail funds will have their name in a drawing to win a fabulous prize!
Simply go to: today and make a donation. Then, head over to and make another donation. We will be notified, and when we get out of jail on November 10, we will draw a name and the lucky winner will receive a prize.
Remember, it is for the babies **SQUEEE**!

Friday, October 23, 2009


So, I'm sitting at my desk minding my own business, answering the phone like I usually do, when the lady on the other end of the phone says "Erin? Great! Just who I was trying to reach! You've been arrested by glerbidy blog glip..." This is where I stopped listening because I was REALLY confused.

"What? The Who? The Where now?"


Oh crap, they caught me! I thought as a leader of a hilarious nation, I would have immunity. I guess not. I wonder what they caught me for, I better not say anything just in case. I've learned THAT lesson from many a sitcom!

"... THE MARCH OF DIMES!"  *Squeee*!

Oh... phew!

It's a fundraiser and it's for BABIES! Who doesn't love other people's babies! I know I do. Here's the spiel:

HELP!  A warrant for my arrest has been issued by the March of Dimes for aiding and abetting the fight against prematurity.

I have been found GUILTY of wanting every baby to be born full-term and healthy! To avoid doing hard time for my crimes I must raise my bail quickly.  YOU CAN HELP bail me out – or contribute to my incarceration.  Visit my cell online at today.

To learn more about how your dollars are helping to fight prematurity and save babies’ lives visit the March of Dimes at 

If you or someone you know has had a child born prematurely or with birth defects, or who has lost a child, encourage them to visit a special site for families at

Rest assured, I will be publicly humiliated for all of your monetary efforts. Mug shot and everything. I'll keep you posted, and if you have some spare change for the BABIES *squeee*!  That'd be great!

OH! I should mention, that I totally fingered KYLIE as my partner in crime:  so if you want to donate to her page, go ahead, I don't mind. :)


For many around the state, the kidnapping of Jacob Wetterling was a shocking and sad crime. For me, it was a watershed. I was 11 years old when 11 year old Jacob was taken, and living just an hour south of his hometown. I remember standing in our family room, having come downstairs to talk to my mom, and stopping short as we watched the coverage unfolding on tv. I know she talked to me about what was going on. But I just remember the horror. It was the very moment I learned that bad things happen. It wasn't that I was very sheltered as a kid — I grew up in the Twin Cities — I knew about safety and that bad people were out there. But until Jacob's experience was broadcast, it wasn't real. I didn't know him, but feel like I did; his tragedy is a very real part of my life. Years later, when a schoolmate was kidnapped and murdered by his neighbor, purportedly because he "was different", I thought back on Jacob, and I wasn't the one in the counseling office the day after the Pioneer Press put Grant's photo, complete with a gunshot wound to the head, on their front page. I already knew the truth by then. Bad things happen.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

I'd Die for "Rocky Mountain" Oysters?

The mighty oyster. Mother of Pearl. The World's Most Perfect food, according to Anthony Bourdain. Indeed, it seems like the oyster is a decadence worthy of sampling on my inaugural adventure onto Sugarloaf Mountain in Roosevelt National Park this last week. That's right, I was going to have oysters in the Rocky Mountains (rest assured they weren't going to be be Rocky Mountain Oysters!).

I have this habit of wishing for things that I wish I could do, and then allowing those wishes to come true. Not long ago, after hearing my friend Jo Jo Potato describe a meal her Chef Brother, The Former Twerp, Map Boy, Jeff prepared  for her, I wished I could travel to Colorado one day and sample some of his cooking.

After becoming fully embroiled in this little hobby of haute cusine, top chef, and eating "anything but hotdish", I began to wish I had the "Rocky Mountain Oysters"* to try the real thing. That little rocky nugget from the sea. I was, however, too chicken to order them in a restaurant.  Any number of embarrassing things could happen, the least of which being, I wouldn't like them and have to pay for them.

Can you see where this is going? That's right! Last week I traveled to Colorado for wedding! Jo Jo came along to help me drive and we made a stop at her brothers... and as we were wandering around Whole Foods, he suggested oysters!  I couldn't believe it, the man could read my mind!

This adventure would not be just a mere tasting, however.  It would start with learning how to shuck the motherf'ers. It is not easy, but with determination, Jo, Elizabeth, Jeff, and I got those puppies open with a butter knife. We just had to remember to "wiggle and twist.

The next thing would be to taste them. Jeff demonstrated everything from start to finish, so I was confident that I would be able to pull this feat off.  Open the shell, swoop around to loosen, squirt with lemon, tip back into the mouth, hold it there for a sec, and swallow. Easy.

I did it! And it was... amazing. It was like pouring the sea into your soul. The salty breeze wafted to your nose and the juice was like waves pouring down your throat. It was bright, fresh, and definitely not hotdish. It was a gorgeous experience and one that I will treasure, because it will be the last time I will ever eat an oyster. It turns out I'm allergic to oysters. Damn'.

Not long after the feast commenced, my upper lip started swelling and I was having a bit of difficult time breathing. We searched the house for some benedryl and I subsequently stopped swelling and then passed out from the medication. Luckily we didn't have to make the 30 minute drive down the switchback roads of the mountain into the nearest town. Coming from a food allergic family, my parents and sister almost had a heart attack when I told the story about how I had a allergic reaction up the mountains and promised my mom I wouldn't ever eat oysters again... at least without an epi pen near by.

Oh well! On to the next adventure!

*Supposedly, Rocky Mountain Oysters are some kind of deep fried testicle. So, I'm told.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

a new found love or getting dirty

I have known for a while that I needed something new to do. Something for me only, that didn't involve another person participating. I knew this because I felt incomplete. kindy edgy. not completely happy about all the good things in my life. and because when asked what was going on and what was new in my life I was responding with statements about things long past or what other people were doing currently. Or simply staring blankly at the person asking until the level of uncomfortableness caused them to turn and walk away.

I needed to create something. I like making things. I have to say, I am pretty good at making things. Nothing in particular but definately "things". Supper got the majority of my creativeness but now I am bored with that.

Pottery is the lucky medium. It took a while but I am finely there. Tuesday and Thursday's from 6-8 pm. absorbed. with clay. with watching others work. with creating. with zoning out. with ideas. oh, the plethora of ideas of what is next.

For those 4 hours a week I am one with myself. I am not thinking about what I need to do at home. I am not thinking about all things I need to do better or what I need to do to save the world or at least my friends and family. I am calm. I am energized. My mind is crystal clear and energized. What shall I make next. Oh, my it's almost time to go. What is he making..oh....i can do that!! It involves running water, it's hands on, I can get lost in watching the clay centering in my hand. I am in love.

Guess what you are getting for Christmas!

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

 I cannot wait to go on vacation.  I'm leaving in about three hours to make the 12 hour drive to Boulder, CO. My best friend Jo Jo Potato is coming along with me. I think I am just as excited about this trip as I was to leave for Mexico... but maybe that's because I haven't left the state since then.

Now the Queen of  Howktown has much love for traveling. Mostly it's the eating out at different restaurants, and seeing the different landscapes and such... oh and visiting the peeps.

So it has been a year and a half since I've been on a big vacation, big deal you say. I used to make a road trip somewhere out of state at least every 4-6 months!

This trip has the auspicious title of  Family Wedding, and that will be good I'm sure. However, JoJoPotato's little twerp of a brother, who amazingly got older just like Jo and I did (how'd that happen?) and he isn't so much of a twerp anymore lives out there, too.  I think this trip was destined to happen for me and Jo.

I'm counting down the minutes until we are on the road. Yee Haw.

HOWKTOWN APPROVES:  Road trips with your best friend since the 5th grade.

Monday, October 12, 2009

Holy Pumpkin Pie, Batman!

This ice cream tastes exactly like Pumpkin Pie!

You should go out an buy some now and eat it.  Then you can do like we did and put caramel and mini chocolate chips on it.

Or do like Kylie suggested and  make an ice cream pie/cake out of it in a graham cracker crust.  If I didn't have a 'World Famous' pumpkin pie recipe, that people wait to sample every year, I'd consider never making pumpkin pie again!

P.S. Howktown is now in possession of a camera aside from the one on her phone. Expect this blog to be pic-a fied.


Officially I declare to the world:
I am going to spend my protest as warm as possible as often as possible.
Age may be getting to me, I am willing to admit.
But I will admit it from the comfort of indoors, wrapped in a blanket.

Friday, October 9, 2009

Think Like a Tree
by Karen I. Shragg

Soak up the sun
Affirm life's magic
Be graceful in the wind
Stand tall after a storm
Feel refreshed after it rains
Grow strong without notice
Be prepared for each season
Provide shelter to strangers
Hang tough through a cold spell
Emerge renewed at the first signs of spring
Stay deeply rooted while reaching for the sky
Be still long enough to
hear your own leaves rustling.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Blog 1; Post 1

So. Hello Everyone. I am here. Blogging.

You haven't heard from me before. I would like to say that I have been too busy. "I am too busy to "blog"." I work. I have things to do. Well. that is true but not the whole story.

Getting to the point where I can blog has been quite the process. My knee jerk response is that I don't like blogging. I don't like that in order to keep up with my friends and family, that I have to "read" about them. Why can't we just get together? Why can't you call me and say, "hey, how was your day? and let me tell you about my life" It also bothers me that I can read all about the activities, interactions, and events of a person who doesn't have time or energy to interact personally with me or if does, has nothing to say.

Another roadblock to blogging is this feeling of needing to impress my readers. I am not a "writer". I am nervous about having an "audience". Do I match my writing style to the owner of the blog? Do I try to keep up with the "wittiness" of my sisters? What is the topic? Just "whatever?" I don't even journal.

Then there is the vaguely disturbing stories of people not getting jobs because of something they put on facebook or a blog. Or getting in trouble with work or loved ones. I don't want to be judged because of a misplaced picture of me drinking in Thailand or whatnot...

I also don't like being pressured to do things. "Don't tell me what to do."

So, while spending all my time focusing on my internal blathering and poutiness, a funny thing has happened. My mother knows more about my friends than I do and I have many conversations that go like this; "oh, guess what. Lin is pregnant." " I know". "Sara, how is your uncle?" "what?" "Sara, how is that one thing working out for your sister and how come you don't blog on your sisters blog".

So here I am. Joining the world. My Grandpa Howk's words to my Dad echoing in my head "Loren, you have to move with technology or you will be left behind". Oh, and , my friend from work Abby just asked "Saraaa, are you becoming a blogger?"

Why yes, Abby. I am.

Monday, October 5, 2009

Buenos días!

Hola, mis amigos!

Just a little announcement to my whereabouts for the next 6 months.  I am in MEXICO. Sitting by this pool.  If you see me walking down the street looking dapper in my red hat, wool trench, and 10 foot long scarf... remember I am in MEXICO. Greet me accordingly.

If a scale a snowbank to get to your front door, remember I AM IN MEXICO, hand me a margarita and greet me accordingly.

I will have my laptop, cell phone, The Shark, and other communication essentials with me, but remember, since I am in MEXICO, I might have difficulty understanding you unless you greet me accordingly*.


Feel free to stop by MEXICO, anytime!

Pass the Nachos.


* A proper Mexican greeting would include using such friendly greetings as Hola! Buenos Dias, Buenos Tardes, Here is your Margarita!, Isn't this pool, great! Boy, you sure look tan!, Isn't this sunshine wonderful?!, Would you like some tacos? and other such niceties.

Touche`, Stacy, Touche` *

In Response to the last post by The Mayor of Ingvaldia:

Sent:Monday, October 05, 2009 8:39 AM

in a world filled with murder, mayhem and h1n1 ... blogging is safer then handshakes.  stacy ------------------------------------------------------------------------------


You may have noticed that The Mayor hasn't been posting to the Howktown Gazette recently (or at all). She has a lot excuses, some of them good... like she didn't know how to log on.  So this weekend I assisted her in that endeavor.  She now has no excuses for not being able to log on.  I can't say that will increase her posting though, since technically I wrote that post for her while she was sitting next to me.

*(Snrk. touche! I crack myself up!)

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Don't expect much.

Happy Birthday, Erin. I hope your freaking happy. I blogged, okay. Can I go on with my life now? Huh? Huh? You know, interacting with people on a personal level. With voices, and handshakes, and such?

Thanks. Love you too!
Ta Ta!

Friday, October 2, 2009


Birthday Was Good.

Remember, this national holiday isn't over yet, my friends. There is still tomorrow.. which is Friday.

G'night y'all.

And the winner to the contest is... me. There were no enteries, so i guess that means, I WIN!

Awesome. I guess I have a few more things to learn about blogging, and maybe bribing comes later. Until then, have a good night.